the Sun and the Moon

Based on an Idea by Ant Briscoe.

The Sun hates the Moon.

Look at him – whizzing about the stars like no body's business. Hanging around that Earth. Only him, as well. Billy no mates. Saturn and Jupiter are the party planets.

“Oy!” the Sun blared, as Moon glided past for the umpteenth time.

“yerwhat?” Moon wasn't listening, shot right past.

“Oy!”

next time Moon came around, he stopped. Moon knows the Sun doesn't like him, so he's less sociable when he talks to him.

“yeah?” Moon asked.

“what do you do, really?”

“what?”

“what do you do? Why does Earth hand around with you?”

“Well...” Moon started, thinking. “I'm night-time, aren't I? When you tip off the horizon, I pop out, keep the sky interesting...”

“only because you reflect me!” Sun protested. “anyway, your not really needed for night-time, are you? I bring light, which is essential for all life. Night-time is just the lack of me. Everyone goes to sleep at night, anyway. Are you that boring, that everyone goes to sleep when you arrive? When I leave, everyone's like 'oh, well, never mind, I guess I'll go to sleep until Sun comes back.'”

“I'm useful...” Moon muttered, still in thought of something to put that smart-arse Sun in his place. He suddenly piped, with more than a hint of pride, “I'm beautiful.”

“what do you mean?”

“I'm romantic. The shivering light of the Moon, the shiny blue haze, the dark craters, the face of the Moon... I'm serene, and peaceful. You, your overbearing. No one can even look at you, or they will never look at anything ever again! You are so ugly and so bright, I cannot imagine what it would be like, how it would feel to never be looked in the face.”

a low blow. Sun burned a strong, deep red.

“you insignificant little rock! You tiny, tiny clump of dust! I could fir out a solar flare, without any effort at all, and blow you, and your whole stinking world into atoms and dust!”

“all right, calm down, Sunny boy...”

The Sun had had its moment. He returned to a bright yellow-y white. He sighed, breathing out slowly. Things were all right again. Moon made a mental note not to push things too far for a bit.

“So..” Sun continued, “why are you important?”

“the seas?” Moon suggested. “I've got the sea's going down...”

“yeah, I'll give you that one.” Sun agreed. “the tides are important to Earth.”

“thank you” Moon quietly replied. Right then, which is better, day or night?”

*

“dawn?”

“dawn is nice,” Moon replied. “I like dawn. A new day.”

“yeah, I like dawn, too.”

“you would,” Moon retorted, “that's when you start working!”

“all right, easy...”

“How about Midday?”

“Midday can fuck off!” Sun snapped. “I hate midday. how do you feel about midnight?”

“I love midnight...” Moon soothed. “midnight is the most peaceful part of any day. It's either a shiny new day, or the last remaining part of the night.”

“I like lazy afternoon.” Sun replied. “its so peaceful. Occasionally I'll burn the sky a slight reddish tint. I think it adds something...”

“I'm noticing a pattern” Moon suggested. “peacefulness. There are certain parts of day and night that are peaceful and serene. Perhaps we cannot really decide on which is better. I mean, without night, there would be no day, and without day, no night. One cannot really be better than the other...”

“still...” Sun suggested. “I prefer day. They may be both necessary, but I'd prefer to work day than night, any time.”

“I would hate to work day” Moon replied. “I love the quiet of the night.”

“Oy!” Earth shouted. “Get to work!”

Sun and Moon may not get along, but they both enjoy the occasional debate. Earth always comes along to interrupt things.

“Well, I better be off...”

“same. I'll see you around, sometime.”

“yeah, see you later.”

and both the Sun and the Moon went back to work. They would meet up, again and again, forever an ever, and they would continue to argue and debate over which of the two is more important. And they would never decide on an answer.